Thursday, June 17, 2010

Alphabe Thursday, The letter V'




Boy, thursday comes fast! This alphabet meme is hosted by Jenny Matlock..Click on the sidebar button to see more........

Those that know me, know I am opinionated, but I also try not to be controversial on my blog. It really is about life and art and kids and not so much about my views. Today, though I am going to state my opinion, so here goes.....


V is for get a vasectomy and give her a vacation!
What the heck am I talking about? The Duggar family...








I dont watch this show on TLC, it disturbs me...I appreciate family and children and I am all for procreation, but come on...you have procreated a small village at this point.....The plus side of this family is the parents love the kids and the dad is able to feed all those mouths....and yes, they have the right to choose this. I am just worried about two things...First of all the mother.....I watched her on an interview one time and it seems that her womanhood to her is all tied up in pregnancy....What is going to happen when that is over? I would also worry about the wear and tear on her body..Can you imagine what it has done to her? By continuing to get pregnant as an older woman she puts herself and a baby at high risk and is that fair to all the other children? My other issue is when you have a big family like that, you have to be taking some of the older childrens childhood away from them....I had a friend who was the oldest girl of eleven kids and she was a mom by age 9...She was so envious of just being able to be a kid. This mom and dad have 18 healthly children, and one sick one. They just need to love the ones they have and quit making more...If the mom cant make the decision, then dad needs to step up...Every time I look at him, I just want to say, "get off her already..." Am I the only one disturbed by this?

30 comments:

JDaniel4's Mom said...

I haven't seen the show. I don't think I would be a good mom to so many.

Julie Harward said...

I cannot judge them at all...they are doing a good job of it..it is her agency to choose her path in life. I don't know which is worse, this or people who think 2 is a huge family and work all the time and never see the poor kids who are being raised by day cares...so I don't know~Come say hi :D

Patty said...

Melinda, I totally agree with you. I've only seen this show once or twice and the last time I saw it was when the youngest was born. It is obvious that the older children are expected to have a very big hand in raising the youngest. It isn't fair to them. It isn't healthy to have children one right after the other and yes, it is their choice, and they do appear to be a loving family but they've also found a way to exploit their situation. I've known two families who have had twelve plus children, one had eighteen and most of the younger kids grew up and are very dysfunctional. Maybe they would've turned out that way if they were a family of say, five, but I tend to believe being in such a large family played a part in their troubles.

easternsparkle said...

Oh we have families like that here in the UK - a lot of them are living on state handouts because they are unable to work - I'm with you!

jen said...

I've only watched this show once. I am the mom of seven living children, and, although I don't have as many as she does, I don't think it hurts the older kids to learn family responsibility and assistance at a young age. I don't know how she can manage all she has--seven about kills me.
Pleased to find your blog today.

Mrs. Sew and Sew - Karen said...

Oh I so agree with you on this subject. I have watched the show and am amazed how the children behave. I think that the Duggars have done a great job of raising the 19 children they have. I like their values. The children all seem happy. I am concerned about the mom (Michelle) after this last birth. She could have died and as you said that would not have been fair to her children. I could go on and on about this subject. YES, I think ole Jim Bob needs a vasectomey. The sooner the better. Sorry JB, just my honest opinion!!!

Now, I"ll keep my nose out of other peoples business! Happy quilting, Karen

Ruhammie said...

This gave me a chuckle! I agree, you rob children of a childhood...and yes, get off her!! Come on...it's just selfish at this point!

Ruhammie said...

This gave me a chuckle! I agree, you rob children of a childhood...and yes, get off her!! Come on...it's just selfish at this point!

Something Special said...

Hey, I have 8 children and I am like Julie Harward (above) who also raised 8 children. One of hers is married to one of mine. We have both been busy moms and are busy with grandchildren constantly. I agree with her in that they have the right to chose. They are responsible people unlike the single (Octomom) mom who wants attention and had 8 babies on top of 6 children already. They are kids with problems waiting to happen.
I hope it has not just become "a lets see how much attention we can get" or can we break a record and get a TV program. I wouldn't want to sacrifice the privacy of my family in that way. I don't like reality TV anyway, no matter what it is. The Duggars do have good family values, but having had 8 myself with a set of twins, my body is probably worn out because of it. I can't fault them too much, cause I had 5 children and the oldest was 5. My children are all grown now and happy and well adjusted having babies of their own. sorry about the ahort novel.

Something Special said...

Hey, Speaking of babies. I am having a giveaway over at my blog in honor of my 10th grandchild born two weeks ago. I think you would enjoy looking at it. Come say hi!

Mrs. Mobunny said...

Just a thought here....families that have just two children can be quite dysfunctional and on food stamps. Equal fault can be found with large *and* small families.
I say we should all wait and see just what happens with their children before being too hard on them.
Quite an interesting V word I must say!! I guess I would have used the word Violet, had I been blessed with another girl, that would have been her name.

Natasha said...

You have certainly raised a very valid point about her health and well-being. I admire her for her seemingly endless supply of love and patience though....I stress out with only 2 kids and one hubby!

Best wishes and happy Thursday,
Natasha.

Natasha said...

I meant to say un-endless!
Natasha.
:)

Jo said...

well .... this is a hard one for me to comment on ... as long as the kids are being raised well (which they seem to be) and the parents are able to financially support them (which they do) then .... it's a good thing ... for them. This being said, it certainly wasn't my choice, nor would it ever be. I just hope they do stop because of health issues ... a body can only do so much.

Pam said...

You certainly selected an interesting "V" word. I've never seen the show but did read about the problems with the last baby in People magazine. My dad came from a large family (9) but that was years ago on the farm.

Viki said...

I just wonder how someone can support that many children.

Maria said...

I've even seen this family here in Aussie on 60mins.

The big kids do seem to have to step up a lot but I surpose it is their choice. I could not do it.

Laurie said...

One thing that bothers me, is if you notice on this show, it seems all women are good for is pro-creation. There is no individuality outside of that. They all dress in second hand clothing, or home made, all wear their hair the same, and the kids are basically raising their siblings while Mom is in a constant state of pregnancy. Yes it's time for ol Jim Bob to get a vasectomy. I think he's proved his manhood! (Did you ever notice HE wears real clothes?)

Bleubeard and Elizabeth said...

I've never seen the show, heard of it, or watch reality TV. This entire thing was new to me. From the comments and your story, I got the impression this family was on TV as result of a contract for having a ton of kids. What concept is that? What is it teaching our younger generations? This is straight out of the 19th century. Have we learned NOTHING from the past?

My thoughts on vasectomy are a bit skewed, I guess. I think it's the woman's responsibility. In fact, it's a simple procedure they can perform immediately after giving birth. That way, if Jim Bob walks out, she won't have to worry about another man taking advantage of her.

Sorry, Mel, but I think the whole concept of this show is all wrong. I worry about quality TV, and this seems so worthless in my book. Of course, what do I know. I have a cat and neither of us has offspring!

jeff campbell said...

Interesting choice for your "V"...I would think the wear and tear on her body would be enormous...too many post partum depressions. What do I know...I'm over my head here. I do know however she would be in big trouble in China:-) Peace and blessings

mbkatc230 said...

Interesting choice for V! I don't watch the show either, the entire concept disturbs me on a very deep level. While I certainly agree the size of your family is your individual choice, I feel that they are exploiting their family by showing every intimate detail of their lives on television. And I do applaud the fact that they support this huge family with no "handouts", however, would they be able to live this comfortably if they didn't have a TV contract? My father was one of 13 children, but that was ages ago and they lived and worked on a dairy farm. They were self sustaining and self supporting, and 10 of the 13 went to college. But it's interesting that most of them only had 3 or 4 children, because they all moved on to other types of work. And I really don't know how it can be healthy for the mom, she has got to be totally worn out. Food for thought here. Kathy

Personalized Sketches and Sentiments said...

I personally can not imagine that many children; however, it does seem as if they are all loved and cared for and they are able to support them. My hubby's grandfather was one of 23 kids-none of which were multiple births-and his great grandmother died during the last birth...otherwise, it would be interesting to know if there would have been more.

I agree with "Something Special's" comment that at least this family is more responsible than the Octo mom.

Blessings & Aloha!
(Thank you for stopping by and thank your hubby for his military service!)

Jenny said...

Melinda, what a great link on our journey through Alphabe-Thursday's letter "V"!

I totally agree with you on this.

I have the philosophy if no-one would watch these ridiculous shows people would quit doing such attention getting things.

But I suspect some people would continue to anyway.

I feel for those kids. How will they exist in a world without reality TV definining their lives!

A+

Margaret said...

I've never seen the show but from your description I know I couldn't/wouldn't want to do it!
Margaret

bad penny said...

I know a mother of six children - the oldest got fed up with being " little mother" for her siblings & was terribly embarrassed that her mum was always pregnant or feeding a child.
However they are a lovely family quite old fashioned in a way - very religious & go back many many generations in this village.

In the od days - that mum would have died in cildbirth by now. I know they have their rights but to me - it doesn't seem right.

Yarni Gras! said...

The thing you said that most hit me is the fact that her identity is totally wrapped up in being and mom...a preggers mom at that. She is going to have a huge meltdown one day. I don't know HOW they can support a family that large on one income. We can barely do it right with only 2 children!

PERMANENT POSIES said...

It has been a long time since I wanted to read everyone's comments on a subject. Way to stimulate thought on our Alphabet Thursday path, Mel. I watch the show all the time and am amazed at the calm demeanor and kind ways of this woman. I only had four and I thought I would go crazy. I think her having so many children has to do with her convictions about birth control and she obviously believes that God is in control of making her babies. She would have been a saint 2000 years ago but today....she is thought of as foolish. Hmmmmmm..... Though it is not for me, I respect their love and affection for each other. I also admire the way they have taught their children to respect each other and their parents. I think the whole reality TV thing is crazy. Well, let me rephrase that....it would have been crazy to see me and my family on reality TV. That might have gotten some ratings..haha. Anyway....some women do find fulfillment in having lots of children and as long as my tax dollars don't have to feed them and as long as their children are loved and cared for, I say....go for it. I would have had more but that was all I could afford....and we did utilize the V word of the day.

Colleen - the AmAzINg Mrs. B said...

Although I haven't watched this show - I do hear about it form others and I have to say I agree with you completely. With the world's situation, the lack of resources, the lack of food, I think it's irresponsible to continue on their path..the care of these children may not be their burden today - could be the world's burden tomorrow..

Elizabeth Golden said...

I only had 5 children and my body screamed enough is enough! 18 - I can't even imagine. She will be wearing diapers soon if she isn't already. I am like you I wonder about the emotional toll on the children, how much love can you spread around in one day? At this point they are all in different emotional zones, a lot of hard work to stay in tune with all of them. I don't watch a whole lot of TV so I have never seen them, but I do wish them luck on this journey.

Elizabeth Golden said...

Hey you are one busy girl!!! I love everything you have been up to, the fairy garden, your roses are beautiful!! Sorry I was so upset by my post I forgot to tell you this.